


in this world

by xpityx



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 14:02:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18316694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xpityx/pseuds/xpityx
Summary: It had been eight months. Eight months since he'd last seen Alex in person. He'd still been Kallus then, had still been convinced that the Ghost crew were taking him to his executioners.





	in this world

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta'd because my SPAG beta is moving countries in two days and I have yet to rope any of my Star Wars friends into beta'ing duty.

 

Zeb looked up at the ship that Alex was on, and wondered if he would be disturbing him if he went to say hi. He'd arrived two hours ago but had only just escaped the briefing. He was never sure why all of them needed to attend, what was even the point of writing mission reports if all they were going to do was rehash the whole thing in person anyway?

 

It had been eight months. Eight months since he'd last seen Alex in person. He'd still been Kallus then, had still been convinced that the Ghost crew were taking him to his executioners. Zeb knew the separation had been more than half deliberate—Rebel command and Hera colluding to make sure they each got their space. He even understood why: Zeb could have either been there to help Alex rebuild himself, or he could have left it to the professionals so that when they next saw each other maybe they'd both be ready for friendship, for something. He wasn't sure was between them, and now he was stood in hanger 6 wondering what he was going to say to him. They'd kept in touch, sending messages whenever they had a secure line, but he was worried that speaking in person was going to be a whole different bag of convorees.

 

Zeb shook himself out if his musings and swung himself up onto the half-dismantled shuttle, following the sound of muttering until he found Alex, or rather until he found half of him.

 

"Try it now!" Alex shouted down to someone from the inside of a wall panel. There was a neatly packed tool case on the floor and Zeb could see the top half of Alex's t-shirt clad back over the edge of the panelling. There was a brief roar of engines which cut off abruptly to the sound of swearing.

 

"That would be a ‘no' then," Alex said to himself.

 

"Hey," Zeb said, causing Alex to spin around. Shock then pleasure flashed across his face before he slid back to the calm mask that Zeb recognised as his default expression.

 

"Hello yourself," he replied, gracefully swinging down to the platform Zeb was stood on, "when did you arrive?"

 

"Just now," Zeb replied, unable to stop the grin he could feel from spreading. Alex had oil in his hair. A great deal of it, in fact, probably from attempting to push it back into some kind of order. Zeb stepped forward and pulled him into a hug.

 

"What—" Alex exclaimed, "you idiot, you'll get oil in your fur!"

 

Zeb ignored him, not letting go until Alex put his own arms around him and patted him briefly on the back of his jumpsuit. When he pulled back Alex was scowling and pink. It was a good look on him.

 

"Got you something," Zeb announced, immensely pleased with both himself and the universe in general.

 

"You bought me something?"

 

"You got quarters? I haven't been assigned a room yet."

 

"Room 44, on B wing," Alex replied, looking like he was trying to keep up, "you bought me a gift?"

 

"That's what I said. I'm going to go get some food - I'll bring it by later."

 

He gave Alex's hair a ruffle then turned to go.

 

Alex let out what could only be described as a squawk, but Zeb was saved by retaliation as at that moment the engines started up again. He made his escape.

 

-*-*-

 

He knew people puzzled over their friendship. He and Alex exchanged messages on almost a daily basis when they were off-mission, and for the last month he'd been keeping an eye on their respective timetables, more eager that he wanted to admit to see Alex in person again.

 

Zeb wasn't human, wasn't Twi'lek or Mandalorian. He was a Lasat, and he just couldn't hold on to all those acts and words, all that history and weight that most sentients he knew seemed to carry around with them. Lasats lived a long time: who had that kind of memory? He could see what Alex was doing now, and his actions and words were good enough for Zeb, and that's all anyone needed to know. He knew from a few throwaway lines in messages they'd exchanged that Alex had continued his therapy after the six-month mandatory sessions. He was proud of him. It took an incredible amount of bravery to do what he did, to turn his back on all he'd known, and even more to get up at the end of it and put himself back together. He did worry about Alex though, about how he had been dealing with the scrutiny of both being ex-ISB and his friendship with Zeb.

 

Zeb didn't hesitate this time, knocking on door 44 once he reached it. He did double check that the small, comm-sized rock was tucked safely in his belt before pressing the door pad at Alex's faint ‘come in'. The door slid open with a beep and he stepped through.

 

"How'd you get a single?" Zeb asked, looking at the small space rather than at Alex, who stood in the middle of the room at parade rest.

 

"Nightmares," he shrugged, and Zeb winced in sympathy.

 

"Er, maybe this'll make you feel better," Zeb fumbled, nearly dropping the tiny glowing rock on the floor as he pulled it from his belt. He held it out and Alex took it, holding it between his hands as if he held something precious.

 

"You found another meteorite?"

 

Zeb shrugged, not wanting to admit how much searching had gone into the gift.

 

"Thank you," Alex added, uncomfortably sincere, and Zeb stretched at the back of his head while he tried to think of an appropriate reply.

 

Alex put the meteorite onto a shelf to his left, then stayed there, his hand still on the stone and his body angled away from Zeb.

 

"I don't know why you would want me," he said, without looking up, "but I think that perhaps you do and I—," he faltered and Zeb stared at him for a moment, trying to process what he'd heard.

 

He shook his head a little. Must Alex always be so damn brave?

 

Zeb took a step forward so he was in Alex's personal space, then slowly turned him so they were once again facing each other. Alex visibly steeled himself before looking up.

 

"I do," Zeb confirmed. "And you? Do you want me?"

 

"Yes. And not just now. I mean, if you would be amenable…?" He winced, and Zeb grinned. It was a delight to see him so tongue-tied.

 

"Yeah," Zeb replied, watching Alex react to how deep his voice had gone, "I'm very amenable."

 

The kiss was soft and cautious at first, as they negotiated the differences between them. Zeb tried to keep his fangs to himself, but Alex seemed to determined to have them as near to his own lips as possible, seeking them out with his tongue. They parted after a few minutes, Alex delightfully pink again.

 

"I've never…"

 

Zeb twitched his ears back in surprise.

 

"I mean, not with someone who mattered," Alex clarified, and Zeb felt his heart clench. Just when he thought he was done finding new ways to love this idiot.

 

"You matter," Zeb told him. Alex looked at him as if searching for the truth of the statement. Zeb let it all show on his face, how he felt, what he hoped for. Not that he had much choice in the matter - it was the kriffing ears, his ears had always given him away.

 

They kissed again, no hesitation this time, and Zeb did something he'd been thinking about doing for longer than he cared to admit: he put his hands under Alex's thighs and pulled this legs to wrap around his waist. Perhaps Alex thought he was being quiet, but Zeb would pick up a conversation from about as far as Chopper could, so Alex's low moan was explosive in his ears and he tightened his grip in response.

 

They eventually made it the narrow bed. Zeb had gotten Alex stripped to the waist but Zeb was still fully dressed and uncomfortably aware of how aroused he was within the confines of his sheath. He pushed Alex back onto the bed and with quick, practised movements removed his jumpsuit. He was pleased to discover Alex watching him closely when he stood and Zeb made sure to flex as he crawled up over Alex. They probably should have discussed divergent biology at some point before this point, but they made a pretty good team and he was sure they could work out the basics for now.

 

"And why are you still dressed?" he asked.

 

Alex continued to stare at him in gratifying shock for a moment, before squirming out of his pants and uncomfortable-looking underthings, trapped as he was within the cage of Zeb's arms. Zeb fluffed his back fur—just thinking about how unprotected human genitalia was made him pull his own further into his sheath for a moment. He watched carefully as he placed a hand over Alex's flushed cock, fascinated by the smell and texture. Alex moaned under his breath and Zeb grinned, allowing his own cock to emerge from its protective sheath.

 

Alex licked his lips, "I think we're going to need a lot more lubrication that I currently have on hand."

 

Zeb puzzled at his meaning for a moment then chuckled. "We can worry about that next time, yeah?"

 

Alex nodded, and then they were kissing again, Zeb lowering himself down far enough to rub against Alex, who made an obscene sound when he managed to find the right angle. Zeb shuddered and, fighting to keep from collapsing on top of Alex, he gritted his teeth and concentrated on making Alex make that sound again.

 

-*-*-

 

Zeb lay curled on his bunk on the  _ Ghost _ . Well, he mostly lay curled on Alex who had been stroking his ears for the last half an hour or so. Zeb was fighting a losing battle not to purr. Every time he gave out a little chirrup of sound he could feel Alex's grin though, so he shut it back down. He had followed Zeb around the Ghost two days ago doing a frighteningly accurate impression of Zeb's growl when he climaxed, which had both been a turn on and deeply embarrassing. So far no-one had guessed what exactly Alex had been impersonating, though Ezra had enjoyed Zeb's embarrassment so much that he'd attempted the noise himself. It had been simultaneously the most awful and most hilarious thing he'd ever heard. Even Alex had let out a bark of laughter. Ashla only knew what he would do if Zeb started to purr.

 

The stroking stopped for a moment, then for a moment more. He worried at first that Alex was just bored, but Zeb could feel his heartbeat pick up under his ear.

 

"What is it?" He asked, without moving from his position. He was slowly learning how to approach Alex when he was struggling with something and the first rule was ‘give him some privacy'.

 

"I don't want this to end," Alex said, quietly, "I don't think I could stand it."

 

"Who says this has to end?" Zeb asked. They'd already had the awkward—is this a relationship, yes, are we monogamous, Lasats really didn't do polyamory so also yes—conversation, so Zeb wasn't sure where this was coming from.

 

"Zeb, we are both rebels, fighting impossible odds. We could die at any time."

 

Zeb did look up then, rolling over onto his side and propping himself up on an elbow. He moved slowly to give Alex some time to compose himself if he needed it.

 

Alex mirrored him, and Zeb waited until he met his eyes before he started speaking.

 

"Listen, not too long from now this war is going to be over: the Emperor will be dead and the Empire will be dust. When that happens you and me, we're going to settle down on a nice planet and we're going to adopt a load of orphans and we're going to live happily ever after."

 

Alex tried to smile, but it collapsed into a look that Zeb couldn't make sense of. He'd expected Alex to laugh in all honesty. He'd been going for something ridiculous but it had all come out a little more sincere than he'd meant it to.

 

"Do you promise?" Alex asked.

 

Zeb reached out and pulled him into his arms.

 

"Yeah, I promise."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ in this world _

_ love has no colour _

_ yet how deeply my body _

_ is stained by yours _

Izumi Shikibu

(translation by AS Omori and K Doi)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on [tumblr](http://xpityx.tumblr.com/) ^^


End file.
